So the saga continues...

I am really starting to feel old. I know I know...I am 24 almost 25 and that is not remotely old. But I am starting to see younger and younger ones all around me and I am on the older end of the VLB Age group. *sigh* Rachel and I were the ONLY older VLB's last night in class. I just feel old. WHEN did time happen? I graduated HS almost eight years ago, that is just wrong!

The story on the saga is...the cross competition. YES I KNOW, it's not about winning. yada yada. I DID pray about what our cross should define and what it should be about, and we have worked super hard and that thing is suuuuuuuuuper massive. I did the spiritual side of it, but just as much as I have done all that I am still competitive. I STILL want to win. That is me and that is how it is, NOW I will say, if I got in a really wrong attitude about it and threw a fit y'all could smack me down and say "whatchou talkin'bout willis"!!! I saw another team's cross last night (with permission of the team leader from that team) and I have to say it is AWESOME. If they won, even though I want to win, I could see why. It's really really really put together and I think it just looks great. It's clean and streamlined, in design, super awesome. We have yet to stand ours up and I am getting to church early tonight IN HOPES that it will stand up okay. I don't think people know how big it is. But its about 12 feet tall and 8 feet wide. So...it's big. I just want it to stand, I have anchoring provisions at church, I am hoping the bottom level will hold the weight though.

I miss Damon. I have been thinking a lot about him today. I was talking to my momma a few nights ago and it's almost as if I feel guilty because I don't have more sad days. By no means am I over the love of my life. I think of him often, I read the love letters he wrote me and look at our pictures, I am still completely in love with him. He was my hero, he IS my hero, yet I wonder why I am not as sad as others still seem to be. I know God is my helper and I don't want to discredit anything HE has done for me, but I don't want people to think I didn't love Damon or that I am over him already. It's not the case! I WILL ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS love that man, goodness he was totally supremely wonderfully amazing. I wish he was here. He made life complete. I think I can say that, because even in God's perfect creation of Adam HE said it wasn't good for man to be alone. Though Jesus is my all in all, I think/know He also created that part of our life that loves to be filled by a Godly companion. I hope that made sense.

In other news...I have a few things I need to do. Get Damon's trucks spark plugs changed, the lawnmower's engine looked at, and....well, I can't remember. Those are the main two things I am thinking about fixing wise. His truck didn't start having issues until after he went to heaven, otherwise he would have fixed it before vacation. I miss him, man I miss him. He was so HOT! (i know, i know...don't gag at my mushiness, or if you don't agree. tis' my opinion and i'm stickin' to it!)

I am sad VBS is coming to a close. Sometimes I wish time would stop so you could enjoy things longer. Morgan and I did our beat boxing last night, Wendy said it was embarassing. I hope it turned out good, Megan wants us to do it again tonight and get it on video. HAR HAR, nooooo. Tis' going to take some serious convincing to repeat that ON video.

In closing... CHECK IT OUT!