Wednesday, June 20, 2007

prayer

I really really need prayer...I am so sad. I dont even know if that's the word, devastated and heartbroken. I go to sleep and that feeling in the pit of my stomach goes away. I wake up and it is there again. I remind myself it was his time to go, but it doesn't make this sadness disappear or the realization of the fact he's gone go away. My husband is gone. I keep rethinking those last moments. I can't remember him like that. I can't even type what I am feeling, I know the Lord will never give me more than I can handle, but this is reall really really hard. I wish I could have him back. This house feels lonely, everything reminds me of him. I slept with one of his shirts that I hadn't washed yet. I don't know how to do this. I keep saying I don't know how i am going to get through this, then I think "with the Lord". It is true, but no easier at this point. I dont know what else to say.

19 comments:

Tammy Washburn said...

We are praying for you Kasey and for your's and Damon's family. We love you.
The Washburn Family

Jason Mullins said...

Sis. Kasey, I am praying for you. It was such a shock to me. God bless you and uplift you at this time.

Grace & Co said...

We all are praying for you Kasey and grieving with you at this time. Please take comfort in knowing the entire Church of God is lifting you up in prayer as you try to handle everything. We're here for you, always. You have my number too, if you need to talk to someone.

Keep on keeping on...

Anonymous said...

Sis. Kasey as others have said I was shocked to hear this sad news. I have no idea what you are going thru, but I know that God will help you thru. As Gracie said know that the entire Church of God is lifting you up in prayer in your hour of need. A young man from our church once had a lesson titled What God brings you Thru He'll see you Thru. Our thoughts and prayers are with you!

Beth Bradley
Truman, AR

marshasblog said...

Kasey,
Donald and I are praying for you...We love you and you are definitely in our thoughts and prayers. Just call on him...God never Fails...

Heather said...

Kasey-
You are in my thoughts and prayers every moment. Even though I can't imagine your heartache, the Lord knows and He is there for you. We love you...

Washington Okie said...

Sister Kasey,

I just wanted you to know that our prayers are with you during this most difficult time. We will continue to pray for God's perfect peace and comfort to surround you. What a glorious reunion day Heaven will be!

Bro. Ray Adams & Sister Tammi

Crazy Girl said...

Kasey, I know you don't know me, but I read your blog often. I am so sorry to hear this sad news. My family and my church family is praying for you. We are deeply sorry for your loss!

Kristal Cox
The Church of God Bessemer, AL

Unknown said...

Pray.. read.. sing.. cherish his memory, the life he lived, and the love he had for you. don't force yourself to forget, but remember and smile despite the tears.

you are surrounded by people who love you and want to be there for you, just know that when you need to be alone, it's okay to be, and when you need to be with someone, we're here for you.

Rachel said...

Kasey I just want to run over there and give you a big hug and cry with you. My heart just hurts so much and I know you're feeling that even worse. I was looking at the little doll that Damon was so eager to give Sara... I am going to miss him so much.

I wish I could take away the hurt for you Kasey. I know that it won't just go away, and that even with the Lord it's got to be almost unbearable. I just pray that though the hurt is so strong that even stronger will be God's presence with you.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

I don't think being comforted means the mourning goes away, it just means you're held while you mourn.

You've sang that song for others and now it's your turn to be held.

Words just seem empty but I love you and my prayers aren't stopping.

Anonymous said...

Hi Sis. Kasey,

I was shocked when I heard of your husband's passing. I want you to know that I am praying for you and your family.

Sara Clifton
Member from Texas

LaDonna said...

Kasey, We love you dearly and we are praying for you. I feel like I'm walking around in a fog and there is a rock sitting on my chest. How much more pain you must be feeling. David sends his love, and Chelsei, Lindsei, Jacob, David, and I are all praying for you. I will never forget Damon's smile or his gentle spirit. I look to Heaven now and know that he is there. Until we see him again, we will miss him terribly. May you feel God's peace surround you like a loving embrace.

Anonymous said...

Kasey,

Words fail us at times like these. I am in shock and heartbroken! I know what a special young man Damon was and I know he loved you. Hold on to every sweet memory you have experienced in life with him, and try as hard as it is, to look to being together again in paradise with Jesus. Remember with all the hurt, mourning and brokeness you are feeling, that God and those in heaven are rejoicing together because another sheep has come home to the Good Shepherd.

Rest in Peace my beloved friend, Damon...

Vicky Bly

Juls4Him said...

Kasey,
I want you to know that Brother Jeff and I have been grieving so heavily since Rachel called yesterday. She and I thought about how we would feel if it had been Brad and we know we can't even get a hold of it. I haven't been able to keep tears back much through tonight and today. Part of our grieving is also because we know that Damon was Brad's best friend. It meant so much to us how good he was to Brad. We always had fun joking about him being the other twin I gave up at birth. I did see him like a son. Today my daughter (who has been estranged again for weeks now) called to tell me that her son, Elijah's father was killed by gunfire (gangs) in El Salvador yesterday. What a contrast in emotion it was for me because I couldn't have any words of comfort. I thought about one soul who loved Jesus and is rejoicing with Him in His love, and that we will all see again. And one soul who knew nothing of the love of Jesus. Oh thank the Lord for His mercy and grace! And that mercy and grace is going to see you through this. He will carry you and keep you and protect you. None of us understand this but we have that blessed hope. I am praying for you, for your Mom and Dad, for Damon's family, and for the whole church family at Antioch. There are no words but I know that prayers are everything and my prayer is that you feel them coming. I (and many others) have people praying for you that you have never heard of. I don't know right now if we can come but our thoughts and prayers will be there with you all. Sister Julie Riddel

Unknown said...

Kelley and I love you and are praying for you during this difficult time. The rest of the church here in Franklin is praying for you and your family as well. May God grant you the peace that passeth understanding.

Love,
Ryan, Kelley, & Anna

Vicki Smith said...

Kasey,
I just want you to know I love you and my heart has been breaking for you since hearing the news. Only God can comfort you in a tragic time such as this. Words are hollow. Spend as much time as you possibly can in the Word--it can bring real comfort. When you're desperate, open the Word and ask God to speak to you. Even in the midst of horrific turmoil you can feel the Lord's arms around you and hear Him speak to your heart through the Word of God. If you can keep a journal of your thoughts and feelings it may help you sort through things. Especially, keep track of how the Lord speaks to you through His Word.
As others have said, the whole Church of God is praying for you and mourning your loss. You have no idea how many prayers have been prayed for you and for Damon's family during the past 24 hours, but God has heard each prayer and He loves you so much! We are continuing to pray for you.

Unknown said...

I don't know what to type...I admire your strength, and yet want you to know that there is strength in grieveing. The grief process is difficult, but you can find healing through the Lord. I know that right now there are so many things to think about and take care of, but know that the Body of Christ is feeling your pain and hoping we can help heal the hurt in any way that we can.
Love,
Mandie

donaldestep2 said...

Sister Kasey,
I know my wife has already said it, but I want you to know that we love you very much and are in constant prayer for you. I can't remember when my heart has felt so heavy, so broken over anything. Please know that you are loved...by all of us, but most of all by the God of peace, who is able to sooth your hurting soul, to mend your broken heart. My prayer is that you will feel His warm embrace every moment of this trying time.
God bless you and keep you,
Donnie Estep

J Nowling said...

Kasey, When we heard about your loss my heart hasn't stopped aching for you. When one member of the body hurts, the whole body hurts,even when you don't know each other personally (you know Jenna). Prayers, here in Alaska are going up for you. I'm praying the comforter will be just that for you and your family.